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REVENGE, they say, is a dish best served cold.
Although in the case of Miley Cyrus or Shakira, it appears to be more smoking hot.
Pop star Miley has shot to the top of the charts with ‘revenge song’ – and absolute earworm – Flowers, while the Colombian singer isn’t far behind with her own ‘diss track’, BZRP Music Session #53, and whatever happened to the humble breakup hairdo?
Fans have gone into meltdown over the many possible digs at Miley’s ex-husband, Liam Hemsworth, in the fun video for the record-smashing song, pointedly released on the Aussie actor’s birthday.
Among the juicier theories addressed by the singer’s sister, Brandi, on her podcast ,Your Favorite Thing, this week include that the mansion where it was shot “is the house where Liam used to take people [to] cheat on her with”, and that the 30-year-old is wearing the suit her ex had on when he reportedly told her to “behave for once” while posing for photographers on the red carpet in 2019.
“Only Miley knows the truth,” her big sis said. “Genius though.”
Calculated or coincidence, coming on the heels of Shakira’s viral breakup anthem, either way it seems there’s a lot of fecked-over women out there who can hard-relate to that other old adage: ‘Don’t get mad, get even’.
After splitting from Gerard Piqué amid allegations the footballer was playing offside in more ways than one, the 45-year-old dedicated the juggernaut, released earlier this month, “to all the women teaching me how to make sweet lemonade when life gives you those sour lemons.”
“Good luck with my so-called replacement,” she not-so-subtly swipes in the translated lyrics of the Spanish song. “I’m worth two 22-year-olds. You traded in a Ferrari for a Twingo.”
Although, to be honest, the father of her two children didn’t seem particularly bothered when he went Instagram official during the week with his new love, Clara Chia Marti, a 23-year-old PR student with more than a passing resemblance to the She Wolf herself.
It got me thinking generally about the lengths that we women sometimes go to try and get our own back on toxic exes.
The world memorably ooh-ed and ahh-ed when Princess Diana stepped out in her thigh-kissing ‘revenge dress’ in 1994, while Khloé Kardashian even got a TV show out of her heartbreak, with the self-explanatory Revenge Body running on E! from 2015 to 2017.
Hypothetically speaking, of course, I’d be fairly miffed if a woman half my age came into my house while I was on tour, had her way with my fella, then to add insult to injury, scoffed my strawberry jam: a meme that Twitter’s been having lots of fun with lately.
But, whether it’s a sexy new makeover or a chart-topping song, you’re wasting your time if you’re hoping to regain the attention or get revenge on someone who has long since mentally scrubbed you from their hard drive. If you ask me, a trip to the hair salon sounds just as cathartic, and a lot less work.